Did you ever notice that it seems almost “un-cool” to admit you like certain glitterati types?

So I’ve decided to come of the closet–right here & now–and scream it to the world: I am a Pamela Anderson fan! What red-blooded American male–any male, for that matter–can look at this picture and not get an instant woody? If I ever start playing for the home team, this is the kind of girl I wanna take home to mamma! Hell, I’d even call her mamma, if she asked! Kinky!

In the interest of full disclosure I have to admit that, while I did give Stacked a lookie loo (The premise–a sexy chick wreaking havoc amidst nerdish book-types–was right up my alley, after all.), I’ve never seen Bay Watch or any of her various other television incarnations; nor have I seen any of her movies. What I like about Pamela Anderson, what draws me to her, is the woman behind the brouhaha.

Yes, she is scald-your-eyes gorgeous. Yes, her voice is little-girl sexy. Yes, she fucks rock stars. (Would you turn down Kid Rock? Would you really?) Yes, she’s had implants (I’ve heard she is now silicone-free and hope it’s true, because she certainly doesn’t need it.) Yes, she won’t be starring in any adaptations of A Streetcar Named Desire or A Glass Menagerie or Death of a Salesman anytime soon.

Such fluff! You should be ashamed of yourself!

There’s is much more to Ms. Anderson than the superficial patina of her public personae. Don’t confuse the gig with the woman. Just like any of us, she’s working what she’s got. Pamela knows her tissue-clasping audience and plays to them. Considering her fame and fortune, I’d say she’s working it just fine.

Behind the full lips, blonde tresses, long legs and killer bod, is a very astute business woman, devoted mother and passionate animal rights defender. Google her name (For text–not images–you singularly-minded perv!) and, like Jane Mansfield or Judy Holiday before her, you will find a much deeper side (ignore the hype and dig a little) of this modern-day fem fatale. Adjectives like strong, committed, courageous, intelligent, and savvy are just a few that come to mind.

What a dame! What a lady! What an inspiration!

(But don’t go cheating on me with her, because then I will have to hurt you!)

Evidently, little Davie, who dreams of being the next Chris Rock or Ryan Styles (see his links), thought recording his prank call to a Phone Sex Service and requesting a “clown fantasy” would propell him into instant stardom.

Alas, due to an awesomely talented PSO (Phone Sex Operator), Davie won’t be resigning from his fry cook job anytime soon.

While the dispatcher putting out this call could use some PR skills, the PSO who created said fantasy gave it all she had.  She punked the punk!

Whoever you are, my partner in crime, I send you super-sized kudos. Save that recording! If you ever go looking for another position as a fantasy facilitator, it is awesome proof that you ROCK!

Click to hear Phone Goddess get the laugh last on Davie!

While I’ve wanted to do this blog thing for a very long time, I dreaded the commitment I knew it would take. Commitment is not exactly one of my favorite words, the proof being my four and 1/2 (don’t ask) broken engagements. So here we are–more than a week into this–and I’m actually kind of liking it.

Could it be that marriage might be right around the corner? Is this the beginning of a personal renaissance? Might I actually start being on time for lunch dates? Will I start setting my alarm, reading directions, making a grocery list, regularly picking up my mail, consistently using my Blackberry? (I don’t really have a Blackberry; I just wanted to impress you.)

Or could it be that–just like the teenage epiphanies I experienced every autumn of every new school year–these new girl resolutions will soon slip-slide away, most likely when I am taking a bubble bath or reading Stephen King or buying my newest pair of shoes. Because, after all, these things are important, too!

Guess we’ll just have to wait and see, heh? You never know, I just might suprise you.

Ok, well, maybe I won’t.

But if you happen to be reading this? Thanks for being there.

I found these fabulous black & whites, collected by a gentleman who obviously knows how to appreciate a sexy set of gams, at a little geo-cities website. As my legs happen to be one of my killer attributes, I thought about sending him a marriage proposal via email. I mean, after all, might as well marry someone who is gonna love, adore and appreciate you. Right?

But then again, I already have you to love, adore and appreciate me. Isn’t that true, my precious pet?

Wanna see more?

Who knew?

1. Born again Christians are just as likely to divorce as their secular counterparts.
2. Historically, polygamy has been the more approved form of marriage.
3. There are more long-term marriages today in America than in the past.
4. College educated women are more likely to marry and less likely to divorce than women with less education.
5. In 1889, a girl could legally consent to sex at the age of ten years old in half of the states.
6. Ancient Greeks believed the purest form of love was between two men.
7. The divorce rate has fallen over twentyfive percent since 1981.
8. Until 1754, when England began requiring marriage licenses, informal cohabitation was the norm.
9. Family polygamy is the most mentioned form of marriage in the first five books of the bible.
10. The region with the highest divorce rate is in the Bible Belt.
11. The high number of prostitutes per capita in late Nineteenth Century America resulted in a high incidence of venereal disease in married women. (guess who gave it to them)
12. Men rate youth and good looks higher than women do when seeking a spouse. (vacuous pricks)
13. It was observed in early Nineteenth Centry America that at least one-third of all children were born to unmarried couples.
14. A 2001 survey asked schoolgirls if they agreed that, “everyone needed to marry.” Seventyfive percent of American school girls agreed, while eightyeight percent of Japanese schoolgirls disagreed. (smart Japanese schoolgirls)
15. When divorces occur after the age of forty, a recent study showed, wives initiate two-thirds of them. (you go, girl!)

Wanna know more?