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Domestic Goddess

Have you figured out that I like lists? Makes things so much more presentable and neat don’t you think? I have lists for everything (books to buy, grocery list, maintenance list, movies to see, daily itinerary, etc.) as any self-respecting Domestic Goddess would.

Now, in fantasy, a little house-boy or house-sissy can be trained to attend to my myriad lists, making sure everything is done to my liking. Alas, in the real world, men are generally not as easy to train.

And I’m rather particular, bordering on anal-retentive, when it comes to having things done certain ways. (i.e. my towels have to be aligned perfectly in the cupboard, scissors must be available in every room [because I detest opening things], CDs are arranged categorically and alphabetically…you get the picture).

Anyway here’s a little list of helpful hints from your very own Domestic Goddess. Later, I might make another. Aren’t you the lucky one?

  • Frozen vegetables can be microwaved right in the box or bag. Just lower the cooking time by a few minutes.
  • Lipstick makes an excellent gold polisher.
  • An aspirin dissolved in water will extend the freshness of cut plants.
  • Long fingernails? If you wash dishes by hand, you are cleaning those nails too.
  • Hydrogen Peroxide will lift red wine right out of the carpet.
  • Vaseline will restore the shine to patent leather heels.
  • Keep fingernail polish in the refrigerator to slow the thickening process.
  • Blending orange juice before drinking creates a tasty, creamy alternative.
  • LOW-CAL MASHED POTATOES: Mix instant mashed potatoes into boiling chicken broth.
  • Apply bottom eyeliner from the center and out to make eyes look bigger.
  • Be good to your phonesex girl. She can do all kinds of things, give you free minutes and discounted calls….if you give her a reason to be nice.

One Response to “Domestic Goddess”

  1. David Says:

    Wow! I wouldn’t have guessed that hydrogen peroxide would clean up wine spills. You are a woman of many talents.

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