 | Health Care Gone Wild |
 | |
A wealthy hospital benefactor was being shown around the hospital. During her tour she passed a room where a male patient was masturbating furiously.
“Oh my God!” screamed the woman. “That’s disgraceful! Why is he doing that?”
The doctor who was leading the tour calmly explained, “I’m very sorry that you were exposed to that, but this man has a serious condition where his testicles rapidly fill with semen, and if he doesn’t do that at least five times a day, he’ll be in extreme pain and his testicles could easily rupture.”
“Oh, well in that case, I guess it’s okay,” said the woman. As they passed by the very next room, they saw a male patient laying in bed while a nurse performed oral sex on him.
Again the woman screamed, “Oh my GOD! How can THAT be justified?”
Again the doctor spoke very calmly ; “Same illness, better health plan.”
***
The joke is from my sister, who always surprises me with her naughtiness.
In case you’re wondering, contrary to my original hopes, I still am not well. Basically, I’m taking it one thing at a time and resting as needed. Right now, Christmas plans are totally askew, and I am not happy about it. In fact, I’m rather pissed.  Any pain sluts about who’d like to take advantage of my wicked mood?
Still taking calls by arrangement, only if I am up to it.
For more info or to inquire about setting up a call, you can always write me at: zenfetish@angelastlawrence.com.
Now I am going back to bed.  Oh, and while I am gone?
xo, Angela
December 7th, 2006 at 9:03 pm
Sweet Cheeks…hoping you are SOON feeling back to your young and sexy self! Sorry you are still not up to par, I was hoping you were on the mend.
Love the joke! Working in the healthcare field, I have heard it before, circulating amongst the docs…but, how true it is; the better the health plan, the better the benefits!
xoxo, please feel better soon!
December 7th, 2006 at 9:26 pm
This is a very funny joke.  Dear Angela, as always I thank you. And and this time your sister too — for giving a “rise” to my day.
December 7th, 2006 at 9:36 pm
LOL may be overused on the web - but I did burst out laughing when I reached your punchline.
I wish we could put the same joy into your day, Angela, that you put into ours. Rest and get better. None of us are going anywhere.
December 7th, 2006 at 10:44 pm
Very funny. Unlike Lyndee, I hadn’t heard it before. Where can I sign up for this “deluxe” health plan?
The Christmas cards are beautiful. Thanks, Ms. Angela
December 8th, 2006 at 7:07 am
I don’t know which is funnier — the joke or the fact that your sister told it to you. Feel better, dollface.
December 8th, 2006 at 12:21 pm
Can you stand another joke in a similar vein?
A man and a woman were sitting next to each other on a plane. The woman sneezed, took out a tissue, gently wiped her nose, let out a small moan and then shuddered for 10 or 15 seconds.
The man went back to his reading.
A few minutes later, the woman sneezed again, took a tissue, gently wiped her nose, moaned softly and shuddered again.
The man was becoming more curious about his seatmate.
A few more minutes passed and the woman sneezed one more time. Again she took a tissue, wiped her nose, gasped and shuddered violently.
The man couldn’t restrain his curiosity. He turned to the woman and said, “Are you all right?”
“I’m sorry if I disturbed you,” the woman replied, “I have a rare condition. When I sneeze, it causes me to have an orgasm.
The man was embarrassed, but even more curious and asked, “I’ve never heard of that before. Are you taking for it?”
The woman sneezed yet again, wiped her nose, closed her eyes for a second and shuddered. She then looked at him and said, “Pepper.”
Tom Allen
The Edge of Vanilla
December 8th, 2006 at 2:17 pm
Semen first class Java reporting for duty, Maaam. And my dick (er deck) needs swabbing…..Very funny story, Angela. I needed a laugh today…..and it sounds like you need to baby yourself a little more…..take care of yourself; you are precious to many.
December 8th, 2006 at 5:49 pm
Java’s right! Take care of yourself! Your readers and your callers need you healthy. Now I’m off to upgrade my health plan.
December 9th, 2006 at 8:16 am
Tom…my joke’s better. But, then again, women are usually better at most things. Dontcha think?
December 9th, 2006 at 11:08 am
But, then again, women are usually better at most things. Dontcha think?
Since it’s your blog, I’m going to defer to the prevailing opinion
Tom Allen
The Edge of Vanilla