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Angela St. Lawrence is the reigning queen of high-end, long distance training and Femme Domme phone sex, providing esoteric depravity for the aficionado, specializing in Erotic Fetish, Female Domination, Cock Control, Kinky Taboo and Sensual Debauchery. To make an appointment or speak with Ms. St. Lawrence  ...


Vanilla Savant: The Interview

As I noted earlier:

Specializing in Fetish/Kink/FemDom — Fantasy Phone Sex, I have to admit that Mr. Vanilla is not my typical client.

Despite the above statement, Mr. Vanilla has now joined that ever-evolving elite group here at Zen Fetish, my highly-coveted Savant Collection. Think of him as a unicorn among thoroughbreds, The Thing amidst the Fantastic Four, or even a highly-evolved republican among democrats. Because he is all of this and much more. Grouse if you will — Mr. Vanilla is highly regarded by this webmistress and is here to stay.

So…I finally got around to sitting down with Mr. V for the promised interview. And guess what? He was quite the slippery one. Just see for yourself:

Angela: Well, Mr. Vanilla, people seem interested in meeting you.

Vanilla Savant: Really? I’m not quite sure why. But I’m happy to work with you on an interview.

Since I kinda-sorta sprung it on you, I’m certainly glad you’re gracious enough to go along with this. Let’s start with the basics. How old are you?


(pssst: See how non-specific he is? Politely so, of course.)

Mmmm. I do like my men seasoned just so. Older men are so much better to train. Er, I meant, to play with.

Of course that’s what you meant, my love.

(pssst: See how gracious he is? Always the gentleman.)

What are your politics?


Dearest Mr. Savant, we’ve had many political — shall we call them — volleys? A discussion of your politics requires more than four words, dontcha think? At least give me a sentence.

Okay. I will admit to being registered Republican, but with (at times) strong Democratic or at least Liberal leanings.

Are you wealthy?


What a crock! If you are middle class, then I am Food Stamp Fannie hanging out at the soup kitchen. Try again.

Maybe some would consider me wealthy. But there are certainly many others with much more than me.

Not that many others. I’ll let it slide for now. But just you wait ’til I get you on the phone again. I am going to make you do something very naughty!

You tease me so deliciously, Miss St. Lawrence. I can hardly wait. Perhaps we should stop this interview now and have a little phone dalliance?

Not so fast, Buster. Inquiring minds are hanging on our every word! We have a responsibility to the Zen audience.

Of course. What was I thinking? Fire away.

Ok, Mr. Smarty Pants. What is your favorite sexual position?

There’s more than one?

I think you’re teasing me and the Zen readers.

Maybe a bit. But then, you were teasing me. What would you like to know?

Tell us the basics about yourself.

Married. Grown kids. A lawyer. I retired a few years ago and have been having fun exploring new careers in teaching and professional research.

And what, pray tell, brought you to me?

I was just web-cruising one night and found your website, Literate Smut. It was so different than other “phone sex” sites I’d seen: Sophisticated, creative. I was intrigued. Who was the woman behind all of this? So I listened to one of your audio recordings. Very sexy! I left you a five star review, to which you sent a very nice Thank You with an invitation to talk. As I recall, I was a bit nervous.

And then what did you do?

Before making an actual direct call, I decided to listen to another of your recordings. As both of us know and will never forget, I reviewed it with four stars which I thought was pretty good.

Did I agree with you? Did I think four stars was pretty good?

You certainly didn’t and had no problem telling me so. You came at me with a furious email. I was really surprised. My first experience of submissiveness in your presence, I guess.

Did I scare you?

Actually, you did. At least a little bit. But I did email you back with my reasoning.

I remember. You were very polite about the whole thing. And then we started talking. On the Phone, Finally!

Yes. And I got to know what a wonderful conversationalist and companion you are. So for a few years now, we’ve been chatting.

Chatting about …?

Your life. My life. Movies. Politics. What do friends talk about? Or, in the case of politics, what do friends argue about? Literature. Your poetry, which I think is incredible.

(pssst: He thinks my poetry is incredible!)

No phone sex?

Of course there is phone sex. Delicious phone sex. And you really have expanded my horizons quite a bit, which has been exciting and, well, a lot of fun, too. What impresses me is your ability to listen, to build a fantasy around where I am, but to take it just a bit further than I might have suggested, so that I feel totally safe but thrilled by being in new territory. That’s a gift to me every time.

Beloved Savant, your ability to go with me wherever I take you has been your gift to both of us. I have loved and continue to love ever minute of it. But what about other PSOs? Have you ever called any other PSOs?

There are only two occasions when this has happened. The first time was when we were still getting to know each other. You urged me to try others. I think your exact words were, “If you can’t cheat with phonesex, that’s pretty sad.” So I did. But I ran back to you quickly. The experience was horrid. I told you then that it was the best PR you could have given yourself.

I remember that. You were pretty funny. But, in defense of other PSOs, you really didn’t try that hard. What is the second occasion?

When you’ve asked me to help out a friend of yours. Which is typical of your generosity, Angie. You really look out for your peers. It is amazing. Other than that, I really haven’t. I’ve been so satisfied with our calls that there hasn’t been any reason to try to meet someone else.

You show up (under your online name) at this blog quite often. Why do you spend time here?

In a way, it lets me continue the conversation when you and I aren’t on the phone together. Plus Zen Fetish is turning out to be pretty interesting reading; I love the variety of things that you post, and I’m beginning to appreciate your other fans. They always have something intelligent and interesting to say. I’m sometimes a bit jealous of their special relationships with you, of course, but I also have come to respect them. They all show great taste in women, for example!

(pssst: See how charming he is?)

Have you any suggestions for other “fans?”

I think your clients end up being a self-selecting bunch. Someone really crass or rude probably won’t appreciate your subtlety or intelligence and will move on. So your regulars don’t need any advice from me. Except, maybe, not to leave a four-star review!

Any requests of me?

Do I have to be “Mr. Vanilla” forever?

Ah, Mr. V, you’re such a cute savant. Just stay the way that you are. I promise to take you out to play (on the wrong side of the tracks — where the wild things are) lots and lots. Besides, you’re so cute when you squirm.

If you say so. I will trust you. You’ve never let me down yet.

Ok, before we end this, you know I am linking to a charity with each entry throughout the holidays. I want you and our readers to know that today’s charity is First Book. Do you want to tell the readers why?

Wow! Well, I guess it’s because I donated to this charity in memory of your brother, because you and I both so deeply believe in the importance of books and reading and writing.

Yes. It is a lovely charity. Thank you.

And now, my Vanilla Savant, let’s see if our readers have any questions for you, shall we?

Oh no!

Oh, yes!



24 Responses to “Vanilla Savant: The Interview”

  1. LusciousLyndee Says:

    Sweet…nothing wrong with Vanilla! Afterall, ya gotta have some Vanilla to make the Fudge Swirl! And, it sounds as though you have the chocolate syrup swirling now…great job!

    Who wouldn’t/couldn’t love our sweet Angela? I hope you are feeling better, sweets! You have been in my thoughts a lot recently…I know this time of year affects us both, in a very similar sort of way! I love ya!!


  2. hot java Says:

    And now I feel I know our Vanilla brother a bit better. This interview is yet another reflection of the quality that is Angela top to cute bottom (sorry, couldn’t resist). Beknighted by our queen, the Savants have both responsibility and benefit in our kinky realm. Long live the queen!

  3. lit major Says:

    I think I want to grow up to be Vanilla …Not! But I do think it’s cool that you and he get along so well. Opposites attract?

  4. PQS Says:

    Reading Angie’s Interview with Vanilla Savant got me thinking about the lyrics to an old Smothers Brothers song — “Mediocre Fred.” It was sort of a paean to average, middle-of-the-road, ordinary sorts of fellows. Anyway, here it is:

    Mediocre Fred

    There once was a man who was none too good,
    And then I’d say he was none too bad.
    At times he was mighty good for a spell,
    And sometimes he’d go out and he’d raise a little hell.
    Mediocre Fred… Mediocre Fred

    Fred went to work from 8 to 5,
    And he punched a clock to show he was alive.
    Went to church every Sunday morn’,
    Sometimes he wondered why he was born.
    Mediocre Fred… Mediocre Dull Fred

    Fred went to the movies every Saturday night,
    Liked to watch TV and the western fights,
    And he paid his taxes most every year,
    And on a hot summer day, why, he drank a little beer.
    Exciting Mediocre Fred… Mediocre Fred

    Well the days went by, all dull and grey,
    And he didn’t think much and had little to say.
    And when the full moon rose he’d climb over the moat,
    Find some people sleeping and he’d BITE THEIR THROATS!
    Mediocre Fred… Mediocre Dull Fred

  5. PQS Says:

    In rereading my post I’m perhaps appearing overcritical. I’m not. Whatever floats anyone’s boat’s OK by me. But since Angela invited us to ask questions, here’s one:

    So, VS, what sort of fantasies has Ms. St. Lawrence turned you onto? Inquiring minds would like to know!

  6. Vanilla Savant Says:

    Well, there was this one with Betty Crocker. She was in the kitchen, making a white cake with vanilla frosting. And I came in and …. well, I think that’s as far as I’m willing to go. 🙂

    The great thing about talking to Angela is that fantasies are so safe. I think we all want to keep it that way!

  7. AvonBard Says:

    “The lady doth protest too much, methinks.” Could our kinky Mistress Angela be a bit vanilla at the core? Oh, ye gods, no!

  8. LusciousLyndee Says:

    No way! Too much chocolate milk running through those veins!!

  9. PQS Says:

    An erotic Betty Crocker! Yikes! You’re a little kinkier than you let on in your interview!

    Beware VS, and brace yourself. I see a BJ in your future (i.e., Ben & Jerry). Then, maybe, a syrupy menage-a- trois with the likes of Aunt Jemima and Mrs. Butterworth. And I hate to even imagine what she might force you to do with Poppin’ Fresh, the Pillsbury Dough Boy.

    Is there no limit to this woman’s dark imagination? Methinks not!

  10. TheContinental Says:

    You know, I understand completely not wanting to discuss your private time with this amazing woman.

    But, since you and Ms. St. Lawrence both noted that you visited Zen Fetish quite often, would you be willing to share your pen name with us?


  11. LusciousLyndee Says:

    Ha…I believe I know who VS is! I could be wrong, of course!

  12. Puzzler565 Says:

    PQS – you left out Mr. Clean!

  13. Puzzler565 Says:

    And the Jolly Green Giant! Ho! Ho! Ho!

  14. PQS Says:

    A bit of advice, VS — opt out of anything involving the Keebler elves.

  15. Vanilla Savant Says:

    Yep, I do hang out at Zen quite a bit.  But as far as confessing to who I am?

    That information is on a “need to know” basis.  And, quite frankly, I’m the only one who needs to know!

    But I could be bribed.

    I send sincere good wishes for the holidays and new year to all who read here. We have a wonderful bond in our admiration of Angela.

  16. LusciousLyndee Says:

    Uh oh…how Vanilla is one really, if bribery is offered? Hmmm…I may have to rethink all of this!

    Season’s greetings back atcha, VS, and also to all who have had the awesome priviledge, such as myself, of crossing paths with the notable Miss StLawrence!!

  17. Booklover35 Says:

    Inquiring minds, including mine, want to know: Am I vanilla? Am I a savant? Am I Vanilla Savant? Or hadn’t I already evolved to some more fascinating flavor? Hmmmmm….
    Now you all have me wondering. I think I am having an identity crisis here and just might have to call Miss St. Lawrence for some counseling. But if I have been honored here, Mistress, many, many thanks.

    Booklover ….Man of Unexpected Mystery!

  18. TheContinental Says:

    Monsieur VS,

    This bribe you mentioned…

    Perhaps I might take you up on this. Is it not exciting to consider selling such secrets to a possible competitor for our fair damsel’s affections?

    Name your price!

    Au Revoir,
    Le Continental

  19. science nerd Says:

    Let me join the pre-Christmas comment-a-thon. I think VS and I are kindred spirits, perhaps a little envious of the less inhibited life of PQS, but both extremely glad for our relationship with Angela and increasingly choclatized by our beloved mistress. I know I am feeling much more mocha since knowing Angela. She has been the best kinky catalyst I could ever have imagined.

  20. Vanilla Savant Says:

    Both Lyndee and science nerd have used chocolate as the alternative to my vanilla. That required some thought: chocolate is sweet, exotic, somewhat forbidden and perhaps addictive. Ah, yes – that’s life with Angela!

  21. LusciousLyndee Says:

    Oh my, what can be done with chocolate? Whipped Cream? A sweet Marachino Cherry? Nuts? I could go all out and add a nice ripe banana! All would look so appropriate on that “Vanilla” (ice cream).

    Okay, sorry…visions of Dairy Queen this afternoon…have a good day all!

  22. Vanilla Savant Says:

    You, too, Lyndee. I’m off to buy the chocolate syrup.

  23. LusciousLyndee Says:

    Take the plunge, VS!! Peruse the “Vanilla” toppings aisle…and, let your imagination take over. Wait, better yet…let that of your Interviewer handle things…Goodbye Betty Crocker, hello Angela StLawrence!

  24. ZenFetish » Blog Archive » Taboo Fantasy Ain’t So Bad Says:

    […] Despite my championing vanilla sex and a certain Vanilla Savant and regardless of the outrageously enjoyable vanilla encounters in my every day life, I happen to like taboo. […]