Thanks to all of you for your fun spirit.

Carl…would you happen to be a certain Carl I know very well?

The farmer kept records and any rooster that didn’t perform went into the soup pot and was replaced. That took an awful lot of his time, so he bought a set of tiny bells and attached them to his roosters. Each bell had a different tone so John could tell from a distance, which rooster was performing.

Now he could sit on the porch and fill out an efficiency report simply by listening to the bells.

John’s favorite rooster was old Butch, and a very fine specimen he was, too. But on one particular morning John noticed old Butch’s bell hadn’t rung at all! John went to investigate.

The other roosters were chasing pullets, bells-a-ringing. The pullets, hearing the roosters coming, would run for cover. But to
Farmer John’s amazement, old Butch had his bell in his beak, so it couldn’t ring. He would sneak up on a pullet, do his job and walk on to the next one. John was so proud of old Butch, he entered him in the County Fair and he became an overnight sensation among the judges.

The result…

The judges not only awarded old Butch the “No Bell Piece Prize” but they also awarded him the “Pullet Surprise” as well.

Clearly old Butch was a politician in the making: Who else but a
politician could figure out how to win two of the most highly coveted awards on our planet by being the best at sneaking up on the populace and screwing them when they weren’t paying attention?

Luv ya!!!
Lyndee

One day one of his patients, a mere whipper snapper, started trouting around telling everyone the sturgeon’s treatments had made him more eel than he had been and the conked him with a malpractice suit.

Well, the sturgeon was in a real pickeral. The board chased him off the staff and demanded his oyster. But fortunately the case smelt to high heaven so the judge denied the plaintiff’s clam.

The board tried to hire the sturgeon back but by then he had hit the bottlenose pretty hard. But what’s really shad about the story is that the sturgeon ended up on squid-row…

Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.

After Mary Poppins became older, she gave up being a nanny and retired to the West Coast of the United States. After a while, she became bored and decided to open up a small detective agency specializing in solving crimes using her psychic ability and strong nose. She opened a small space on Hollywood Boulevard and posted her sign proudly. It read:

“Super California Mystic, Expert Halitosis.”