Well, there are a lot of reasons.  But what got me started was when I read the following list the first time I found Sweat Shop Sissy’s blog.  He’s just so "normal," ya know?  Of course, I’ve known that about cross-dressers and sissy boys forever-and-a-day.  But not everybody gets it.  It’s the MY FETISH IS OKAY AND YOURS ISN’T syndrome, which just drives me absolutely-tutely nutso.

Mr. Sissy Man composed these "99 things" about himself in response to a writing assignment, which you can read about right here.  I just cherish every single item on this list, probably because it so honestly and frankly illustrates that SSS is Everyman, and that everyman is SSS … just in different undies. 

So, without further ado, let’s have at it.  And maybe you’ll have your mind opened a bit.  What the heck, try opening your heart, while you’re at it.

1. I was born in 1963.
2. I am a proud Canadian.
3. When I was 15, I watched an uncle die of cancer on Christmas morning.
4. I’m not a big fan of Christmas.
5. I’m a fanatic non-smoker.
6. I was a heavy pot smoker for 10 years. (somehow that was ok)
7. I loved hallucinogens. (past tense)
8. In high school I was voted ‘most likely to die choking on his own vomit’.
9. I thought I’d be dead by 30. (so did lots of other people)
10. I still drink (micro brews), but rarely to access. (rye & ginger)
11. I was 17 the first time I asked for a vasectomy. (The doctor refused)
12. I got fixed right after my son (now 10yrs old) was born.
13. My 10-year relationship with his mother ended soon after that.
14. I LOVE being a Dad.
15. I wish he lived with me full time.
16. I have been a ‘scratch’ baker since 1981.
17. I worry that my body won’t hold up to the demands of another 20yrs of baking.
18. I’ve been at the same shop since 1988.
19. I make awesome bread. (More then 60 varieties)
20. I work straight graveyard shifts.
21. I got married for the first (and only) time in June 2004.
22. We met in person 11/11/01.
23. Her 17 yr old son lives with us.
24. She proposed to me on her knee in a restaurant with my Dad’s wedding ring.
25. My Dad died in 1994. So did my granny.
26. I wish my Wife and Son had met my Granny and my Dad.
27. The best people I have ever known are my Wife, Son and Granny. (Sorry Dad)
28. All I know about love I’ve learned from them.
29. I lost my virginity on a Mexican beach when I was 16.
30. The only alter I kneel before is between my wife’s creamy white thighs.
31. I have always been a very sexual person.
32. I kept many of my desires secret until I met my wife.
33. I told her before we got married that I am a cross-dresser.
34. Her only request has been that the facial hair and body hair stays ON.
35. We’re still having the best sex of my life.
36. If schedules allowed we’d have sex twice a day. We average 5 or 6 times/week.
37. We watch porn together.
38. We go to see strippers together. (We’ve had private lap dances)
39. I’m a sissy. Though what exactly that means is something we are still exploring.
40. Every night I brush and braid her hair and also file and massage her feet. I keep her nails looking pretty and her pussy nicely trimmed. (just for starters.)
41. In role-playing I’m usually submissive.
42. She occasionally fucks me with a strap-on.
43. I can wear the same harness to fuck her with 2 cocks.
44. We’ve also used the harness to hold a butt plug in me for extended periods of time. I think the longest has been about 4 hours (we went to a hockey game)
45. I wear women’s undies every day. We often wear each others.
46. Except for 2 pair of silk boxers, she tossed out all my man undies.
47. I have some clothes that could pass for male or female and I’ve gone out in these. The dresses and skirts are for at home only.
48. I know it looks ridiculous.
49. My toe nails are almost always painted.
50. I have silicone breast forms and would love to have a nice wig.
51. With kids still at home, my opportunities to get dressed are limited, but I doubt they’d be too surprised to find out. I’m guessing they’d prefer not to see dad dressed as a woman.
52. We’ve fantasized about including other partners, but so far have never done it.
53. She shaves my head bald every week.
54. She’s given me golden showers.
55. I go down on her during her period.
56. I’ve come in her mouth, cunt and ass all in the same amazing day.
57. We met on-line and still occasionally have phone and cyber sex.
58. I introduced myself by emailing her some of my erotic stories.
59. She thought I was weird. (Do you?)
60. I like to write lots of things, but especially smut. 
61. I’ve had several pieces published, both in print and on-line.
62. Every time you masturbate, god kills a kitten. (Or a puppy)
63. I’ve struggled with depression most of my life.
64. The past 5yrs have been the happiest of my life. (That’s an amazing statement considering my legal woes of the past 2 years.)
65. I have chronic lower back troubles.
66. I like giving massages more then I like getting them.
67. I drive a 2002 Mini Cooper. (Black w/ white roof)
68. I don’t handle stress very well. (Especially financial)
69. I’m a procrastinator.
70. I read lots of fiction.
71. I mostly watch cartoons on TV. (And porn)
72. I also watch the NHL and the CFL.
73. I can be a difficult person to get to know.
74. Tact and subtlety are difficult concepts for me to grasp.
75. I offend many people. Usually without trying. (very hard)
76. I had my first real job when I was 10. (I’ve never been unemployed)
77. I don’t understand having pets.
78. I owned my first business when I was 21.
79. I filed for personal bankruptcy when I was 24.
80. A second business I owned also ended badly.
81. Neither was a bakery.
82. I would love to earn a living writing fiction.
83. I know that that is highly unlikely.
84. I’m a very good backgammon player.
85. I’m a reasonably good cribbage player.
86. I don’t like winter or being cold.
87. I have a letter from Mr. Dressup. (a Canadian version of Mr. Rogers)
88. When I was 16, I got a speeding ticket on my bicycle.
89. I don’t eat anything deep-fried.
90. I don’t consider ‘fast food’ to be real food.
91. I’m a pretty good cook. My wife is a very good cook. My dad & granny were both professional cooks.
92. Coke not Pepsi. I’ll eat any fresh produce except carrots. I don’t like lemonade.
93. I listen to mostly blues and jazz.
94. I love being by the ocean.
95. My wife says I’m sexy. (She’s a goddess)
96. I’ve broken teeth and toes. (my own)
97. I have a crooked smile. (botched orthodontics)
98. Don’t believe anything you hear and only half of what you see.
99.  Fighting for peace is like fucking for virginity; it just doesn’t work.

(the commercial is quick … so hang on)

Oh, and if you’re a Christian?  Maybe you should join this church. 

Which reminds me of a true story re. my phone sex adventures and a particular Christian.  I tell you all about it sometime this week.  OK?

Read and enjoy and then I’ll explain: 

(Craigslist ad)

SEXY ASIAN DOMINA’S SENSUAL PLAYGROUND – w4m

Busty asian temptress wants to wrap you in her spell and use her unique style of sensual torment which is perfect for the inexperienced as well as those seeking more extreme. My specialties are sensual roleplay. Come feel my ropes and lets play with my toys on you as you submit to my will and experience role reversal.

I have a female submissive as well for our experimentation. Double Mistress sessions are also available with advance notice….Double your torment and pleasure.

Come experience from one of London’s best. Incall and outcall are available.

Dave’s e-mail:

Hello Domina,

I need punishment! I want to read my poetry to you and then you punish me for their lack of quality. Here´s a poem I wrote for you, tell me what you think: 

Beat me up nonstop

You are a busty domina
I may come over to see ya
Beat me up and whip my ass
Make me take your masterclass

Her reply:

you have my phone number from the ad.  call to arrange
a session.

Conclusion:

Firm and businesslike, no comment about the poem. I guess this is what one can expect from a popular domina?

****

Found via Pervscan wherein Supervert  was editorializing on the Craigslist vs. Prostitutes controversy currently in the news. 

Our cherished Zen Savant ended with a Shout Out to Dave’s Little Book of Prostitute Poetry, which is just  frickin hilarious.

Dave — of Downloading Porn with Davo — was doing some traveling last year and used his down time to scan the Erotic Services section at Craigslist.  He answered quite a few of the ads, including a  snippet of self-writ doggerel along with the email.   Lucky for us, he documented what transpired. 

I would bet if a girl would have answered in kind — a humorous haiku, for example — she would have caught his attention and nailed down his business in a heartbeat.

…and to Dave:  It is my experience (admittedly limited to observation rather than field study) that, as you so astutely observed, many Dominas strike this aloof tone, mistakenly believing it  adds to their "superior mystique."    While — as your own experience  proved — what actually occurs is a cessation of communication.  Because, really now, after such a cool (and uninspired) response, where does a guy go?  May I suggest that the next time you are seriously looking for a Maitresse — who can kick your ass while leaving a smile on you face — check out Mistress Matisse.  She’s sexy, smart and — what a concept! — friendly. 

… and again to Dave:  You are absolutely right when you say:  "These women get lots of e-mails and consider many of the men who write them as time-wasters."   This I DO know from personal experience.  In the PSO industry we Phone Sex FemDoms call the kinda guy you describe as a WANKER.  And, in our defense, it does get tedious.  Personally, I  find it very disrespectful of these guys.  Then again, we are the "professionals" and need to rise above the mundane and "act as if."  At least until are darker suspicions are validated. 

… and for Dave:                          

wish I’d been hangin’ at craig’s, honey
when you were lookin’ to spend some whore money

the rest of this verse holds no mystery:
you and i’d have made craigslist history

So I finally saw my doctor Monday.  I wasn’t getting better — could barely talk, kinda-sorta sounded like Lauren Bacall.  And while some of you would find this incredibly sexy, most wouldn’t — thus, still not doing regular calls.  Anyway, I sounded so very bad when I called in the a.m., that the receptionist squeezed me in for an appointment that very day. 

So a few hours later I’m sitting up on that little table while the doc does her thing and gives me the dope.  Seems there’s a "bug" going around that just "holds on forever," and being viral in cause, it doesn’t respond to antibiotics.  But since I’d had this for two plus weeks, she decided I might have a secondary infection, compounded by stressed vocal cords from the exuberant coughing.  So she prescribed doxycycline hyclate and prednisone respectively.  I’m into the middle of my third day and things do seem to be clearing up.

In the meantime, when I’ve been feeling "up to it," I’ve taken a few short calls.  Those would be with guys who know I’ve been pretty sick and just want to kinda-sorta talk.  And don’t even want a kinky phone sex experience.  Imagine that!. 

Sweet Mr. Nerd would be one of those guys.  Being the sweet man he is, he indulged and coddled and commiserated — while I hacked and screeched and whined and pouted.  But, alas, all good things must come to and end.  And I suspect that in this case it was none too soon for Mr. Nerd.  So we’re winding down and he asks. "So what are your plans this week, dear Angela?"  I tell him that not much is going on except me drinking lots of fluids, eating even more chicken soup (thanks for the tidings and counsel, LUSCIOUS ONE) and religiously hunching over my  Vicks Personal Steam Inhaler.  Which I usually do while watching TV (very scary … this lowest common denominator ruling the airwaves).  Which reminds me … oh, and that I’m looking forward to seeing Sarah Palin interviewed on Larry King.

Ever benign and tender with my feelings, Mr. Nerd doesn’t tell me that it pains him to find the daily routine of his Phone Sex Goddess has been reduced to the hum drum.  He doesn’t tell me it saddens his heart (and perhaps softens his cock) that — forced by the necessity of illness — the highlight of my week just might be watching CNN. 

But he also happens to be a man of exceptional wit. 

So, without missing a beat, with nary a millisecond of hesitation, he answers (with tongue placed firmly in cheek): 

Goshhhh.  I hope she’s wearing leather.

Which just tickled my funny bone.  Because, between you and me, Mr. Nerd could care less what a gal is wearing.  He needs no paraphernelia, no idee fixes — leather, feathers, fishnet or otherwise — to be extremely hot and always sexy.   Thanks, Mr. Nerd, for being a stand up guy.  And standing by.  I owe you.

xo, Angela

… oh, and I may be able to work tomorrow.  Not sure yet, but I am starting to feel better and sound better.  So maybe … just maybe.