Well, there are a lot of reasons.  But what got me started was when I read the following list the first time I found Sweat Shop Sissy’s blog.  He’s just so "normal," ya know?  Of course, I’ve known that about cross-dressers and sissy boys forever-and-a-day.  But not everybody gets it.  It’s the MY FETISH IS OKAY AND YOURS ISN’T syndrome, which just drives me absolutely-tutely nutso.

Mr. Sissy Man composed these "99 things" about himself in response to a writing assignment, which you can read about right here.  I just cherish every single item on this list, probably because it so honestly and frankly illustrates that SSS is Everyman, and that everyman is SSS … just in different undies. 

So, without further ado, let’s have at it.  And maybe you’ll have your mind opened a bit.  What the heck, try opening your heart, while you’re at it.

1. I was born in 1963.
2. I am a proud Canadian.
3. When I was 15, I watched an uncle die of cancer on Christmas morning.
4. I’m not a big fan of Christmas.
5. I’m a fanatic non-smoker.
6. I was a heavy pot smoker for 10 years. (somehow that was ok)
7. I loved hallucinogens. (past tense)
8. In high school I was voted ‘most likely to die choking on his own vomit’.
9. I thought I’d be dead by 30. (so did lots of other people)
10. I still drink (micro brews), but rarely to access. (rye & ginger)
11. I was 17 the first time I asked for a vasectomy. (The doctor refused)
12. I got fixed right after my son (now 10yrs old) was born.
13. My 10-year relationship with his mother ended soon after that.
14. I LOVE being a Dad.
15. I wish he lived with me full time.
16. I have been a ‘scratch’ baker since 1981.
17. I worry that my body won’t hold up to the demands of another 20yrs of baking.
18. I’ve been at the same shop since 1988.
19. I make awesome bread. (More then 60 varieties)
20. I work straight graveyard shifts.
21. I got married for the first (and only) time in June 2004.
22. We met in person 11/11/01.
23. Her 17 yr old son lives with us.
24. She proposed to me on her knee in a restaurant with my Dad’s wedding ring.
25. My Dad died in 1994. So did my granny.
26. I wish my Wife and Son had met my Granny and my Dad.
27. The best people I have ever known are my Wife, Son and Granny. (Sorry Dad)
28. All I know about love I’ve learned from them.
29. I lost my virginity on a Mexican beach when I was 16.
30. The only alter I kneel before is between my wife’s creamy white thighs.
31. I have always been a very sexual person.
32. I kept many of my desires secret until I met my wife.
33. I told her before we got married that I am a cross-dresser.
34. Her only request has been that the facial hair and body hair stays ON.
35. We’re still having the best sex of my life.
36. If schedules allowed we’d have sex twice a day. We average 5 or 6 times/week.
37. We watch porn together.
38. We go to see strippers together. (We’ve had private lap dances)
39. I’m a sissy. Though what exactly that means is something we are still exploring.
40. Every night I brush and braid her hair and also file and massage her feet. I keep her nails looking pretty and her pussy nicely trimmed. (just for starters.)
41. In role-playing I’m usually submissive.
42. She occasionally fucks me with a strap-on.
43. I can wear the same harness to fuck her with 2 cocks.
44. We’ve also used the harness to hold a butt plug in me for extended periods of time. I think the longest has been about 4 hours (we went to a hockey game)
45. I wear women’s undies every day. We often wear each others.
46. Except for 2 pair of silk boxers, she tossed out all my man undies.
47. I have some clothes that could pass for male or female and I’ve gone out in these. The dresses and skirts are for at home only.
48. I know it looks ridiculous.
49. My toe nails are almost always painted.
50. I have silicone breast forms and would love to have a nice wig.
51. With kids still at home, my opportunities to get dressed are limited, but I doubt they’d be too surprised to find out. I’m guessing they’d prefer not to see dad dressed as a woman.
52. We’ve fantasized about including other partners, but so far have never done it.
53. She shaves my head bald every week.
54. She’s given me golden showers.
55. I go down on her during her period.
56. I’ve come in her mouth, cunt and ass all in the same amazing day.
57. We met on-line and still occasionally have phone and cyber sex.
58. I introduced myself by emailing her some of my erotic stories.
59. She thought I was weird. (Do you?)
60. I like to write lots of things, but especially smut. 
61. I’ve had several pieces published, both in print and on-line.
62. Every time you masturbate, god kills a kitten. (Or a puppy)
63. I’ve struggled with depression most of my life.
64. The past 5yrs have been the happiest of my life. (That’s an amazing statement considering my legal woes of the past 2 years.)
65. I have chronic lower back troubles.
66. I like giving massages more then I like getting them.
67. I drive a 2002 Mini Cooper. (Black w/ white roof)
68. I don’t handle stress very well. (Especially financial)
69. I’m a procrastinator.
70. I read lots of fiction.
71. I mostly watch cartoons on TV. (And porn)
72. I also watch the NHL and the CFL.
73. I can be a difficult person to get to know.
74. Tact and subtlety are difficult concepts for me to grasp.
75. I offend many people. Usually without trying. (very hard)
76. I had my first real job when I was 10. (I’ve never been unemployed)
77. I don’t understand having pets.
78. I owned my first business when I was 21.
79. I filed for personal bankruptcy when I was 24.
80. A second business I owned also ended badly.
81. Neither was a bakery.
82. I would love to earn a living writing fiction.
83. I know that that is highly unlikely.
84. I’m a very good backgammon player.
85. I’m a reasonably good cribbage player.
86. I don’t like winter or being cold.
87. I have a letter from Mr. Dressup. (a Canadian version of Mr. Rogers)
88. When I was 16, I got a speeding ticket on my bicycle.
89. I don’t eat anything deep-fried.
90. I don’t consider ‘fast food’ to be real food.
91. I’m a pretty good cook. My wife is a very good cook. My dad & granny were both professional cooks.
92. Coke not Pepsi. I’ll eat any fresh produce except carrots. I don’t like lemonade.
93. I listen to mostly blues and jazz.
94. I love being by the ocean.
95. My wife says I’m sexy. (She’s a goddess)
96. I’ve broken teeth and toes. (my own)
97. I have a crooked smile. (botched orthodontics)
98. Don’t believe anything you hear and only half of what you see.
99.  Fighting for peace is like fucking for virginity; it just doesn’t work.

As many of you already know or should have figured out, I like books.  I like them so much, I would forsake fucking all men (and women) if I could just figure out how to have satisfactory sex with books.  Which would make me a very promiscuous little slut, dontcha know?  Because I never ever can get enough books. 

So I got an email from Ephemera Bound (see below) announcing a simply incredible sale, which means I’m in big trouble.  Because after books, then shoes … well, it’s sales, of course!  I mean I am a red-blooded all-American girl after all.  Basically, it’s a two for one, which in my book equals superior bargain — I know a good sale when I see one.  As you will see below, you can buy ANY BOOK, and will receive a FREE copy of Suburban Diva.  Which, by the way, is a five star book at Amazon with a retail value of $13.99.  Like I said, I know a good sale when I see one.  Not to mention that this is a book I’ve been dying to read since it was first published.

Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy!  It seems I am in a heap of trouble …

So here’s the deal:

Buy any Ephemera Bound title, get a free copy of Suburban Diva: From The Real Side Of The Picket Fence, by Tracey Henry.

Purchase any title from Ephemera Bound & get a copy of Suburban Diva: From The Real Side Of The Picket Fence for your mom. Purchase two books, get two copies — one for your mother-in-law, favorite aunt, your sister or grandma.

One free copy of Suburban Diva’s book for each book purchased now through April 18, 2008; while supplies last.

Books must be purchased from Ephemera-Bound.com. Suburban Diva: From The Real Side Of The Picket Fence may be shipped separately.

Yes, I am a Book Slut.  And proud of it, so no snide remarks from Booklover or HDB or PQS or the rest of you!  I am on my way to shop now and am absolutely sure I will be dropping some cash, as I’ve been drooling over more than a few of their books for quite a while now.  I am also thinking about my female friends who would really enjoy this book, which gives me an excuse to buy all the other books I’ve been wanting and to gather the free books as presents for my gal pals. 

This book would make a great gift for a wife or mother or sister for Mother’s Day or just because.  Read the reviews, then get over there NOW!  Because, as you can see we don’t have much time.  The sale ends on April 18th!

…with a little help from my friends. And they are simply marvelous.

Lawyer Guy: Well, he’s a caller, a buddy, a lawyer (of course)…and he sent me this very funny joke:

One afternoon a lawyer was riding in his limousine when he saw two men along the roadside eating grass. Disturbed, he ordered his driver to stop and he got out to investigate.

He asked one man, “Why are you eating grass?”

“We don’t have any money for food,” the poor man replied. “We have to eat grass.”

“Well, then, you can come with me to my house and I’ll feed you,” the lawyer said.

“But sir, I have a wife and two children with me. They are over there, under that tree.”

“Bring them along,” the lawyer replied. Turning to the other poor man he stated, “You come with us, also.”

The second man, in a pitiful voice then said, “But sir, I also have a wife and SIX children with me!”

“Bring them all, as well, ” the lawyer answered.

They all entered the car, which was no easy task, even for a car as large as the limousine was. Once underway, one of the poor fellows turned to the lawyer and said, “Sir, you are too kind. Thank you for taking all of us with you.”

The lawyer replied, “Glad to do it. You’ll really love my place. The grass is almost a foot high.”

Gracie Passette & Entourage: Yeah, I had a birthday (8/15). And no wish list! Doesn’t every red-blooded PSO have a wish list? Not this one. I let this quietly slip by because I really didn’t want a big fuss, but Gracie begged, so I let her quietly announce it…thanks, Kittens! I actually spent the day at the hospital with my mother … she needed me more than my birthday cake did. And I received some very nice unexpected gifts and tips … thanks guys (you know who you are!)

Jeremy Edwards: You must remember Jeremy, AKA Jerotic? The fab writer who is oh so very naughty in all the right ways? I’ve written about him and featured his stories on more than one occasion….because, well, I like him a lot. He is a kind and generous friend to Zen Fetish, and I simply love having him stop by: To tell us the latest news, or share a randy little story, or even just for tea and crumpets. Not that I know what a crumpet is. But for Jeremy I would certainly comb the town and search every bakery until I found a crumpet or two or three.

As I’ve previously noted, Jeremy certainly gets around. And we all know the man has magic in each and every one of his dirty little fingertips. Oh, how I love those fingertips! It seems that Jeremy is making new friends over at a divinely inspired blog, Lust Bites (more about this later), where in a piece titled, Spouse-Sharing, Knicker-wetting, Flying Fucks, and Other Scenes of Amorous Tenderness, he asks and answers with elegant locution what turns out to be a not-so-rhetorical question of himself: Am I a “romantic?” Which, in turn, answers the question for all of us, Can kink and romance inhabit the same bed?

What do you think? Is he? Can they? If you’ve followed his work (and I have), you already know the answer. But it sure is fun having Jeremy spell it out with that same whimsical, sexy sweetness that permeates and percolates his erotic fiction. Hubba Hubba!

Sweat Shop Sissy: SSS is another Zen Fetish buddy, whose sweeter than sweet blog actually proves Jeremy’s contention that Kink and Romance can most definitely inhabit the same bed…and even thrive. Because Mr. Sissy Man is living it: An everyday working Joe who loves his wife and family deeply and just happen to wear panties…and it turns the Missus on! Ever so kind, he recently sent me this very funny link (be my guest, do click!) which proves that even men in lingerie LOVE BLOW JOBS!

Libby the Libertine: Speaking of Blow Jobs, Libby (of SexPros), who is a fellow columnist (I’m officially on hiatus, but not for long) at Sex Kitten, recently sucked the most famous cock in the world and possibly of all times? Surely I don’t need to tell you who this cock belonged to? Well…none other than Ron Jeremy, himself! Want all the juicy, naughty details? READ ALL ABOUT IT! I really love what Gracie had to say about this particular (mighty giddy…can you blame her?) confessional: Gawd, I luv you, Libby. Who else is gonna call me at 2 a.m. and say, “Guess whose dick I had in my mouth?” ROFL

Mistress V: Just a quick note here (I tend to go on when it comes to this lady. Aren’t you proud of the restraint I’m showing today?) Have you seen her Fetish Heat Video in which she publicly humiliates a sissy? Well, then, go there now. She is so damn hot! No “pretender to the throne,” this Fetish Mistress.

Lust Bites: I’m smitten. Accordingly, I’ve added this awesome blog to my links under Ethical Smut. A lot is happening over at Lust Bites (The blog on everyone’s lips.) It’s an upbeat hub of activity with a a gaggle (that’s a horde with attitude) of excellent regular writers discussing and opining on all things smut-O-licious…and tossing in a healthy dose of Brain Porn (that means you have to read with one hand and, well…do whatever with the other) for good measure. Plus Guest Bloggers! What a deal! And every inch of it is smart writing. Oh, and did I mention all the Freebies and Give-Aways?

Like I said…I get by with a little help from my friends.xo, Angela

A certain reader, who shall remain nameless (but not guiltless) and is squiggly-wiggly enamored with the “literate” in my professional phone sex site, Literate Smut, took it upon himself to erect a virtual-effigy to me and my websites, an alphabetical list of of naughty alliterations. Being a frustrated poet, I happen to like alliterations and so…here you go (with his side comments included):

amphisexual ass play
breast bucking & fucking
cunt cracking crescendo
dip-stick, drip-stick, dick-stick
erotic, exotic enema (sooo kinky)
freaky fetish fucking
gonzo glory hole guzzling (count me out on this one)
hot hole humping
illicit inseminations
jerk the johnson to jizz
kinky keister kisser
lickable luscious labia
male membrum e-rectum (i suffer from this often)
nimble-hipped nympho
orbital oral intercourse
pecker-pumping & dumping
quim-quenching quickie
randy-dandy rim job
sado-maso mischief
teasing temptress of tele-dick-tion (Our Angela)
urge the prick to purge
voluptuous scrumptious vulgarian
wacking the one-eyed weasel
x-rated extreme reaming
yanking the doodle dandy
Zeusophobic fem domme diva (the irony of it!)

Well…I must say it does my heart good to see my callers/readers stretching their little creative wings. And it always makes me smile.

xo, Angela

it’s the bitch in her ~by Angela

it’s the bitch in her
that keeps you on her dotted line
signed, sealed, delivered
your signature, her hand
done deal

used up and faded blue
the new you
(after all)

after all:
buckled down and tied up
your twisted tongue and caught breath
searching for sonnets

searching for sonnets
on hobbled limbs
and always bended knee
to sing, to plead, to offer alms
to your silent siren
who never listens, never speaks
who only hears her own measure

it’s the bitch in her
that keeps you here and keeps you hers:
her cheap fetish
her pygmy romeo
her corrupt fuck

it’s the bitch in her
that’s taken you down
rubbed you raw
cut you clean
wiped you out
bled you, bled you, bled you

it’s the bitch in her
that fucks with you
fucks you up
fucks you over
and doesn’t give
a flying fuck about any of it

it’s the bitch in her
that has your attention
your cock, your devotion, your heart

it’s the bitch in her
that makes you her bitch

***

What I’m trying to say is that I finally finished moving my FREE erotica blog, Blistered Lips to it’s own Web address and hope you visit often.

The above poem is one of my newest entries and has proven quite popular so far..

***

And…thanks to Mistress V for being the original hostess of Blistered Lips and for being a very good friend.  If you’re a blogging neonate, eager to get your “blogging feet” wet, check out Mistress V’s Vixen Blogs, where you can blog away to your heart’s content at absolutely no cost.  Mistress V even has low-cost hosting plans and will help you transfer to your own domain when you’re ready to upgrade and strike out on your own.  It’s where I got started and look at me now? (No groans from the Peanut Gallery, thank you very much.)

And while you over there, you can still find me–glad to still be hanging out with Mistress V–plugging away at Pardon My French, my collection of sexy quotes.

xo, Angela