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Angela St. Lawrence is the reigning queen of high-end, long distance training and Femme Domme phone sex, providing esoteric depravity for the aficionado, specializing in Erotic Fetish, Female Domination, Cock Control, Kinky Taboo and Sensual Debauchery. To make an appointment or speak with Ms. St. Lawrence  ...


Mae West: Read Her Lips

Wednesday, September 9th, 2009

Oh the things she said!  And in a time of extreme sexual repression, she was able — for the most part — to get away with it. 

Admittedly, I’ve never seen a Mae West movie.  That said, who — regardless of age or inclination or lack of cinema savvy — hasn’t heard her almost rococo delivery of the line, "Why don’t you come up and see me sometime?"  Which, by the way, is from the movie, She Done Him Wrong, also starring Cary Grant.  Another memorable line from the same movie:  "When I’m good I’m very good but when I’m bad I’m better."

Flamboyant and (some would say) raunchy, Ms. West was ahead of her time.  Throughout her career she fought sexism, elitism, repression and censorship.  Despite all of that — including an arrest on a charge of "corrupting the morals of youth" and rigid censoring under the infamous Hays Code — Mae West was an unstoppable force and perhaps even the singular Bombshell Harbinger of the sexual freedoms we enjoy today.

Scrappy and sharp-witted, she was not deterred by her detractors.  Instead, she became the absolute Queen of the Double Entendre.  She, herself, noted that "If I asked for a cup of coffee, someone would search for the double meaning."  Thus — ingeniously and creatively — she sparred and adumbrated and demurred and bantered her way into cinematic history and our social conscience.  World War II soldiers called their life jackets Mae Wests, Warren Buffet quotes Ms. West (Too much of a good thing can be wonderful.) when giving investment advice; Salvador Dali memorialized her lips in his iconic Mae West Sofa

Mae West Quotes

About Men:

  • It’s not the men in my life that count, it’s the life in my men.
  • Ten men waiting for me at the door? Send one of them home, I’m tired.
  • Personally, I like two types of men – domestic and foreign.
  • Give a man a free hand and he’ll run it all over you.
  • A man in the house is worth two in the street.
  • Save a boyfriend for a rainy day – and another, in case it doesn’t rain.
  • I only have yes men around me. Who needs no men?
  • Don’t marry a man to reform him – that’s what reform schools are for.
  • He’s the kind of man a woman would have to marry to get rid of.

About Women:

  • A dame that knows the ropes isn’t likely to get tied up.
  • Good girls go to heaven.  Bad girls go everywhere.
  • When women go wrong, men go right after them
  • There are no good girls gone wrong – just bad girls found out.
  • She’s the kind of girl who climbed the ladder of success wrong by wrong.
  • Cultivate your curves – they may be dangerous but they won’t be avoided.
  • Say what you want about long dresses, but they cover a multitude of shins.
  • A woman in love can’t be reasonable – or she probably wouldn’t be in love.

About Love & Sex:

  • Opportunity knocks for every man, but you have to give a woman a ring.
  • It takes two to get one in trouble.
  • Love conquers all things except poverty and toothache.
  • I’ll try anything once, twice if I like it, three times to make sure.
  • I generally avoid temptation unless I can’t resist it.
  • All discarded lovers should be given a second chance, but with somebody else.
  • An ounce of performance is worth pounds of promises.
  • Love thy neighbor – and if he happens to be tall, debonair and devastating, it will be that much easier.

About Herself:

  • I believe in censorship. I made a fortune out of it.
  • I didn’t discover curves; I only uncovered them.
  • I generally avoid temptation unless I can’t resist it.
  • I never worry about diets. The only carrots that interest me are the number you get in a diamond.
  • I used to be Snow White, but I drifted.
  • I’m a woman of very few words, but lots of action.

A lot of the above I’ve heard time and again, but you know what?  Typing her words into my blog, I’m born-again smitten with this incredible woman.  Make no mistake:  Mae West was a trail blazer in a time when women just weren’t supposed to "act that way."  She possessed an indomitable and indefatigable spirit, which took her far and paved the way for a sexual revolution — which literally changed everything.  And aren’t we the better off for it?  As Mae, herself, said, "You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough."

RIP Mae West (1893-1980)

Although …

… rumor has it that Mae West is alive and well and LIVING ON THE INTERNET.

xo, Angela



Dirty Mind and Filthy Mouth:  Call Callie

Black and Nasty Shemale Whore: Vickitory Secret 

BBW Loves it Rough:  Kitten Chloe

Sex Quotes

Wednesday, March 4th, 2009

Maybe you’ve caught my Sex Quote blog, Pardon My French, maybe not.   I’m behind on a lot of  web projects, but this is one I’m making a reasonable attempt to keep current, because I happen to like quotes quite a bit.  Blame it on my book/reading/word fetishes.  Quotes speak to me:  They’re a short and sweet way of saying a whole bunch of stuff that touches an intellectual or emotional cord and I find that immensely appealing. 

I even have a collection of quotes (not necessarily sex-related, unless something really strikes my fancy) Here at Zen, such as the following gems:

We listened to them, but it was clear they’d received too much therapy to know the truth.  ~Jeffrey Eugenides 

Now I don’t know about you, but I find that seriously funny because it rings so very true.  Jeffrey Eugenides is one of my favorite authors.  You may have read the Pulitzer Prize winning Middlesex, which begins, "I was born twice: first, as a baby girl, on a remarkably smogless Detroit day in January of 1960; and then again, as a teenage boy, in an emergency room near Petoskey, Michigan, in August of 1974."   And if you haven’t, you’re really missing out.  His writing is as on-target and intuitive as that quote — he doesn’t waste a single word.

Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons, for you are crunchy and taste good dipped in chocolate.  ~Unknown

That one just appeals to my quirky nature.  Don’t you like it?  And one more:

To be a book-collector is to combine the worst characteristics of a dope fiend with those of a miser. ~Robertson Davies

Which, well, um.  What can I say?  It’s true and I’m guilty.  I need a 12 Step Program big time.  Anyway there’s more of those if you care to check.  And you’re quite welcome to steal them.  But right now let’s get back to Pardon My French — that other blog of mine.

I’m keeping it streamlined with nothing but a collection of quotes related to sex in all it’s facets.  My goal is to keep the selection eclectic and include every possible source: lyrics, poetry, bloggers, authors, books, etc.  I’m  including typical subject matter (gender, sex roles, marriage, desire, homosexuality) as well as what might be considered atypical (FemDom, humiliation, incest, perversion, castration, sex toys).    I even have Phone Sex and Cybersex categories … probably firsts when it comes to sex quote collections. 

So, today,  I thought I’d share some of the stuff from over there with my readers on this side of the fence .  Although you are certainly welcome to visit, beg, borrow and steal from Pardon My French, since isn’t that what collecting quotes is all about when you get right down to it? 

Here’s a smattering:

Shakespeare (Hamlet) on Hot Dirty Sex:

but to live
In the rank sweat of an enseamed bed,
Stew’d in corruption, honeying and making love
Over the nasty sty…

Elise Sutton on Training a Man: 

Begin to train him to be that perfect man that you desire. Expect excellence out of him and don’t allow him to take you for granted. Begin to discipline him, as men need this. Men grow up being disciplined and nurtured by women. Deep inside they still need and desire this.  So learn how to discipline a man and how to properly train him.

Nietzsche the Misogynist: 

Woman was God’s second mistake.

Camille Paglia on Government and Sex: 

My thinking tends to be libertarian. That is, I oppose intrusions of the state into the private realm — as in abortion, sodomy, prostitution, pornography, drug use, or suicide, all of which I would strongly defend as matters of free choice in a representative democracy.

Denise McCanles on Lesbian Introductions: 

Introductions are tricky in a lesbian relationship. It’s a word game. To my friends she’s my lover, to strangers and family members in denial she’s my roommate, to Jehovah’s Witnesses at the door she’s my lesbian sex slave, and to my mother she’s Jewish and that’s all that matters.

Chinese Proverb:

Virginity like bubble: one prick all gone.

Johnny Depp as Ed Wood on Cross-Dressing:

My girlfriend still doesn’t know why her sweaters are always stretched out.

Violet Blue on CyberSex:

Right now there are more ways to have cybersex than ever thought possible, and it’s making modern couples reconfigure their relationships’ Terms of Service . Cybersex makes it easy to cheat; you don’t have to meet anyone, so the risk factor is low on all fronts — except maybe emotionally. Cybersex is also a more creative form of masturbation, so in many ways it’s not too terribly different than enjoying porn or fantasy.

Pick Up Line:

Do you know how to use a whip?

Faustus via Eros Blog on What Makes Us Hot:

Almost everyone has at least one something, call it an “X,” that can provoke intense pleasure when somehow experienced. The “X” is whatever it is that can sound the deepest and most resonant notes in our inner erotic music. An “X” might be a person, or a kind of person, or a practice, or a fetish, or a storyline, or even a concept. Some people — often people with especially vivid imaginations — may have many X’s.

Groucho Marx being Groucho:

Women should be obscene and not heard.

Supervert (PervScan) on The Matter of Size:

No doubt the most fascinating cock stat to emerge from current research is the controversial thesis by Dr. Rushton that penis size and brain power are inversely related. You’ve all heard the phrase “more balls than brain” — apparently it may really be a biological axiom. Guys with big dicks tend to be dumber than guys with little ones — which, in a certain respect, makes perfect sense. Survival of the fittest is the rule of the land, so if you’re deficient in one area you make up for it another. If you can’t wow ‘em with your wand, you amaze ‘em with your mind.

And because I’m shameless, I even quote myself:

For many submissive men the idea of an Amazon-type dominatrix is a serious turn on. It’s all about the Power Dynamics. Consider the Giantess fantasy. Consider the smothering websites where abundantly fleshy women queen, leg-lock and face-fuck a never-ending parade of men licking their lips, vying to be next.

Of course, a corollary can easily be drawn when considering Humiliation Fantasies, Abuse Fantasies and Small Penis Fantasies.  Not to mention Cuckold Fantasies, wherein the players include the Dominant Wife, her Bull lover and the Wimpy Husband.

And even for those guys who prefer their everyday women more in the petite range — the visual of big vs. little emphasizes who’s the boss and who’s the little, sniveling weakling.


I guess that’s enough for now.  You get the idea.  And if you have any sex-related quotes, particularly if you are a blogger or published writer, please send them my way — the more the merrier!

Or feel free to leave a comment telling us your favorite Sex Quote.

And Happy National Grammar Day!

xo, Angela