A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE

Pamela Redmond Satran

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE …
enough money within her control to move out
and rent a place of her own,
even if she never wants to or needs to….

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE …
something
perfect to wear if the employer,
or date of her dreams
wants to see her in an hour…

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE …
a youth she’s content to leave behind …

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE …
a past juicy
enough that she’s looking forward to
retelling it in her
old age …

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE …
a set of screwdrivers, a cordless drill, and a black lace bra …

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE …
one friend who
always makes her laugh.. and one who lets her cry…

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE …
a good piece
of furniture not previously owned by anyone else in her
family …

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE …
eight
matching plates, wine glasses with stems,
and a recipe for
a meal,
that will make her guests feel honored …

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE .
a feeling of
control over her destiny …

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW …
how to fall in love without losing herself …

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW …
how to quit
a job,
break up with a lover,
and confront a friend
without;
ruining the friendship …

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW …
when to try harder… and WHEN TO WALK
AWAY…

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW …
that she can’t change the length of her calves,
the width of her hips, or the nature of her parents …

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW …
that her
childhood may not have been perfect … but it’s over …

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW…
what she
would and wouldn’t do for love or more …

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW….
how to live
alone … even if she doesn’t like it …

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW …
whom she can trust,
whom she can’t,
and why she shouldn’t take it personally …

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW …
where to
go ….
be it to her best friend’s kitchen table..
or a
charming Inn in the woods …
when her soul needs
soothing …

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW …
What she can and can’t accomplish in a day …
a month … and a year …

***

Well, this one was a little rough to get formatted properly … and I still might not have it all in place.  Despite what might not be totally kosher (as in "originally written"), I worked hard on getting it to fit and make sense, so enjoy as is.  The backstory is that my sister sent me this, subject line:  Best Maya Angelou Poem Ever!  And I simply adored it, being the girly-woman I am.

Yet, something seemed kinda-sorta funny about this.  You see, like most women, I’m a huge Maya Angelou fan.  And while I don’t know all of her work, I certainly know the important stuff — so why hadn’t I ever heard of this poem?  Hmmm.  Time for some googling.  Which brought up this at the Snopes Site.  The REAL Poetess behind this beautiful poem is Pamela Redmond Satran, who happens to have an awesome website where you can buy her books.  Buy her books for me, because I’m totally a Book Bitch and I will read them and tell you all about them.  See how nice I am?

***

Which reminds me:

Best Book I’ve Read This Year:  The Best American Non-Required Reading 2008. 

Which is edited by Dave Eggers (A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius) whom I adore and includes an introduction by Judy Blume (Otherwise Known As Sheila the Great) whom I immensely respect (never got into girly-cutesy fiction even as an adolescent/preteen).  It’s also an attractive book  — it just looks damnably good on the shelf — the cover artwork being that of graffiti artist Barry McGee (check him out here and here).

And I really, really, really wouldn’t mind having 2007, 2006 and 2005.  There’s more … but that would pretty awesome and keep me damn happy for right now.

Worst Book I’ve Read This Year That  I Thought  Would Be The Best Book I’ve Read This Year:  Wicked

Oh-me-oh-my!  I sooo wanted to love this book; from which the Broadway Musical was adapted.  Since hearing this song, I’ve been wanting to see the show and will be seeing it this fall, if all goes as planned.   As far as the book goes, I found the characters uninteresting, the pacing tedious and the convoluted storyline nerve-wracking. Considering the nominations and awards the show has garnered, the same is not true of the musical, so I’m as enthuastic as ever.  Maybe even more so, now that I am curious as to how the writers fixed/transformed the original story.

And:

Thanks to the guys who sent me these books for Christmas, because they are exactly what I would have eventually bought for myself.  You know me well and treat me even better than well, and I adore you for it.

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Phone Sex Goddess of the Day: 

Bella Daisy who keeps a most interesting journal, which you can read right here.  If you like fiesty Italian Princess types, Bella’s your girl.  She’s cute as a button and extremely sexy.  But be forwarned:  she is a woman in control and you will submit!  Call Bella now!

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Phone Sex Quote of the Day:

I tried phone sex once, but the holes were too small.

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And, yup, I’ve obviously been a bit lax in blogging recently.  But do forgive me, because life has been outrageously busy and I have a new personal trainer who is a total bitch — keeping me uber busy, tired and aching.  But I’m looking good and feeling great.  So we can’t really fault either her or me.   Now, can we?

xo, Angela

Catholic Humor:  Thanks to my sister.

A little boy got on the bus, sat next to a man reading a book, and noticed he had his collar on backwards. The little boy asked why he wore his collar backwards… The man, who was a priest, said "I am a Father." The little boy replied "My Dad doesn’t wear his collar like that." The priest looked up from his book and answered "I am the Father of many." The boy said "My Dad has 4 boys, 4 girls and two grandchildren and he doesn’t wear his collar that way." The priest, getting impatient, said "I am the Father of hundreds" and went back to reading his book. The little boy sat quietly thinking for a while, then leaned over and said, "Maybe you should use a condom and wear your pants backwards instead of your collar.

TOP TEN BUSHISMS:  Thanks to PQS and via Slate’s Jacob Weisberg (where there are a total of 25)

1. "Our enemies are innovative and resourceful, and so are we. They never stop thinking about new ways to harm our country and our people, and neither do we."—Washington, D.C., Aug. 5, 2004

2. "I know how hard it is for you to put food on your family."—Greater Nashua, N.H., Chamber of Commerce, Jan. 27, 2000

3. "Rarely is the question asked: Is our children learning?"—Florence, S.C., Jan. 11, 2000

4. "Too many good docs are getting out of the business. Too many OB/GYNs aren’t able to practice their love with women all across the country."—Poplar Bluff, Mo., Sept. 6, 2004

5. "Neither in French nor in English nor in Mexican."—declining to answer reporters’ questions at the Summit of the Americas, Quebec City, Canada, April 21, 2001

6. "You teach a child to read, and he or her will be able to pass a literacy test.”—Townsend, Tenn., Feb. 21, 2001

7. "I’m the decider, and I decide what is best. And what’s best is for Don Rumsfeld to remain as the secretary of defense."—Washington, D.C., April 18, 2006

8. "See, in my line of work you got to keep repeating things over and over and over again for the truth to sink in, to kind of catapult the propaganda."—Greece, N.Y., May 24, 2005

9. "I’ve heard he’s been called Bush’s poodle. He’s bigger than that."—discussing former British Prime Minister Tony Blair, as quoted by the Sun newspaper, June 27, 2007

10. "And so, General, I want to thank you for your service. And I appreciate the fact that you really snatched defeat out of the jaws of those who are trying to defeat us in Iraq."—meeting with Army Gen. Ray Odierno, Washington, D.C., March 3, 2008

Obama is a Cool Cat:  so says Christopher Hitchens

"Our new president’s charm is not merely superficial. It is compounded of two qualities that are distinctly rare in the political class: an apparently very deep internal equanimity, and an ability to employ irony at his own expense. Obama, one can tell, would not have been devastated if he had lost the contest for the White House. Nor was he ready to do or say absolutely anything to win it."

Short and Not So Sweet Sex Poem:  By A. R. Ammons (thanks, PQS)

Well, it did make me giggle.  Thanks, sis.