1. It was mealtime during a flight on Hooters Airline. "Would you like dinner?" the flight attendant asked John, seated in front. "What are my choices?" John asked. "Yes or no," she replied.
2. A flight attendant was stationed at the departure gate to check tickets. As a man approached, she extended her hand for the ticket and he opened his trench coat and flashed her. Without missing a beat, she said, "Sir, I need to see your ticket not your stub."
3. A lady was picking through the frozen turkeys at the grocery store but she couldn’t find one big enough for her family. She asked a stock boy, "Do these turkeys get any bigger?" The stock boy replied, "No ma’am, they’re dead."
4. The cop got out of his car and the kid who was stopped for speeding rolled down his window. "I’ve been waiting for you all day," the cop said. The kid replied, "Yeah, well I got here as fast as I could." When the cop finally stopped laughing, he sent the kid on his way without a ticket.
5. A truck driver was driving along on the freeway. A sign came up that said, "Low Bridge Ahead." Before he knew it, the bridge was right ahead of him and he got stuck under the bridge. Cars were backed up for miles. Finally, a police car drove up. The cop got out of his car and walked to the truck driver; putting his hands on his hips, he said, "Got stuck, huh?" The truck driver answered, "No, I was delivering this bridge and ran out of gas."
6. A college teacher reminded her class of the next day’s final exam. "Now class, I won’t tolerate any excuses for you not being here tomorrow. I might consider a nuclear attack or a serious personal injury, illness, or a death in your immediate family, but that’s it, no other excuses whatsoever!" A smart-ass guy in the back of the room raised his hand and asked, "What would you say if tomorrow I said I was suffering from complete and utter sexual exhaustion?" The entire class was reduced to laughter and snickering. When silence was restored, the teacher smiled knowingly at the student, shook her head and sweetly said. "Well, I guess you’d have to write the exam with your other hand."

Just some TGIF silliness. From my sister Bethany’s interoffice email. Those insurance people sure do like to goof off.

xo, Angela

This entry was posted on Friday, September 7th, 2007 at 11:45 am and is filed under Bethany's Email, Funny Side Up, Rhetorically Yours. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.